Breaking up has always been hard. Whether you had a romantic partner that ghosted you, a loving relationship that didn’t work, or a marriage that suddenly fell apart, there’s nothing easy about the healing process; That’s why there are people who make extensive efforts and get help from dating coaches.
If you have loved someone wholeheartedly but ended up with a broken relationship, the emotional pain you’re feeling might be unbearable. It’s hard to deal with the sleepless nights, thinking of how great things used to be and knowing that they will never be the same. It’s difficult to go on and accept that he’ll no longer be there for you.
But what causes a man to just break things off? What can you do with all your negative emotions? And how can you move on from someone you thought you’d be with for the rest of your life?
For everyone who has been carrying all the pain from a breakup, your intense emotions won’t just fade away after a few weeks, months, or even years. Every person has their own recovery process. However, you can get through it, and there are ways to mend a broken heart.
5 Steps to Heal Your Broken Heart
For those who usually spend time online reading articles about moving on, you might have already found a few tips about how you can get over your ex, such as writing down your feelings or releasing all your anger, which can help in some cases.
Men can break up with women for many reasons, such as not being satisfied, not being able to go through hardships, and more. But to help you more with your healing journey, here are healthy ways to get through your pain slowly.
1. Ask yourself if your relationship was actually healthy.
Sometimes you can be blinded by love and neglect other things that matter. You love him too much that you forget about your self-concept and can’t feel angry about the unfair things he does to you. If things were actually great between the two of you, your relationship would still be there. But if your relationship was never going the healthy way, maybe what happened was for the best.
A relationship that ends isn’t always about having to live miserably because you lost the man you love. Sometimes, it’s also an opportunity to enjoy the beautiful things in life and to open your heart for someone better – someone who will bring out the best in you and surround you with positive energy.
Maybe, you just have to realize that.
2. Accept that the guy who leaves you behind is not your future husband.
Whatever your problem is, your future husband will never break up and leave you behind. If he’s really into you, he won’t say that he can’t take it anymore, things are no longer working, or that you deserve better. A guy who genuinely loves you will never give up on your relationship, no matter how challenging it gets. He’ll fight for you because you’re worth it.
Relationships are not like fairytales where you face one problem, solve it, and live happily ever after. In real life, you can constantly go through ups and downs that will test your strength as a couple. So, if he gave up, he doesn’t deserve to grow old with you, and you need to accept that.
3. If a man can’t accept you for who you are, you shouldn’t be with him.
Have you been spending time trying to meet his expectations but just can’t satisfy him? If your relationship ended because he thinks you lack something, or you have something he doesn’t like, what happened was for your own good. After all, you should never be with someone who can’t accept you fully.
People don’t change for someone else, and if you want to make improvements about yourself, you should do it for yourself, not for a man. If he can’t accept everything about you, including your flaws, the breakup wasn’t about you; it’s about him and his unrealistic standards.
4. Have no contact with him
If it’s over, you need to accept that it’s done – no more texts, calls, visits, or stalking. It’s not about being bitter about the past; it’s about giving yourself the time to process things and accept what happened. You need to stop looking back and exposing yourself to someone who gives nothing but pain. Otherwise, you’ll just be torturing yourself.
5. Don’t compare your ex to the next man you’ll date.
Even if you’d dated a couple of cheaters before or got ghosted by so many men, you can’t tell that your next relationship would be like that. Not every guy is the same, and you can’t judge your next date based on your past experiences. You need to be fair to that person and give both of you a chance to express yourselves, move in the same direction, and be happy.
Allow yourself to experience the positive emotions once again and look forward to a better future.