The first message on dating apps is often more important than the first date. After all, the first impression counts. A first message that is short and sweet gets you an instant conversation lead, while a first message that takes too long to read or has spelling errors might portray your image as either a creep or an unwanted person.
You may be curious about what should I send as a first text? A good opener can make all the difference in a conversation, but you don’t need to be witty or clever. All that really matters is clarity and honesty – two qualities that we often sacrifice when starting conversations or sending the first message on dating apps like Tinder, Bumble, OkCupid (or whatever dating app our generation uses).
If you want to keep a conversation going or get a response from a person that you find very attractive, there are specific guidelines that you should follow when writing your first messages on dating apps. This article will give you a few best dating apps first messages ideas to initiate a conversation with a girl.
How do I start a text conversation?
1. First of All, Ensure Your Privacy
When you first start using a dating app, it can be challenging to know who is on the other end. You may think that you are messaging someone interested in you, but you may be talking to a fraudster.
Recently, there has been a surge in the number of fraudsters using dating apps to scam people out of money. They will often create fake profiles and send first messages to unsuspecting users, hoping to extract their money or personal information.
It is worth installing a VPN service, such as VeePN to protect yourself from these scammers when using dating apps. VeePN provides a free chrome VPN extension that allows you to connect to the dating apps through a different server, providing added security and anonymity. A browser VPN or VPN-enabled google apps for dating can also help you access blocked or geo-restricted dating apps. Its web extension (VPN chrome extension) is one of the most effective tools to keep your online identity hidden while browsing the internet. You can subscribe to its free trial or contact VeePN service support for its premium packages.
2. Prioritize Quality Over Quantity
Unfortunately, many boys attempt to contact a large number of girls simultaneously rather than only contacting the ones who are the best fits. Most of them have a mindset; if they message a hundred girls, at least ten of them will reply for sure. That’s simply a NO.
According to most of the girls on dating apps, they receive plenty of these sloppy mass messages that they simply disregard altogether.
The more time you spend texting females who are a good fit for you, the more likely your dating experience will be considerably more fruitful. Look for girls that share your mutual interests, have the same values, and have the same ambitions as you. As a result, you’ll get a lot more attention from the females you’re interested in.
3. Compliment Common Interests
When you first message someone on a dating app, it can be tempting to compliment them on their looks. There are over 700 dating apps to choose from, and each of them has its own audience and different ways to approach first messaging.
According to researchers at Harvard University, complimenting common interests is generally more successful than calling someone attractive. Usually, girls are more likely to respond if you talk about something they’re already interested in.
4. Keep it Simple
The main attraction of your first message on dating apps is its simplicity. Do not ask more than one question at a time. It’s a common error for boys to bombard girls on dating apps with a seemingly endless barrage of questions. This is debilitating for girls to reply in return. Besides, answering ten questions takes up a lot of her time to avoid such conversations.
Keep it simple with one or two open-ended questions that she can answer quickly. A girl’s profile provides a collection of conversation starter topics on dating apps. Ask her about one particular detail that piques your interest or a question you’ve been pondering for some time.
Bonus Tip: Don’t answer your own questions in the message. Make it simple and realistic that you are serious and willing to know more about her.
5. Keep it Short
Make a brief introduction, show interest in her profile, ask one or two long-game questions on things you have in common, and then simply sign off with your name in the first message you send. There is no need to go overboard. When boys write a lot, they can out as overbearingly aggressive.
Creating a positive first impression is the primary purpose of your first message to a girl; for example, sending your first message like an essay will make a bad impression, and some may consider you a creep.
Bonus Tip: Your message must sound confident. Because effort and confidence in your first messages make you worth knowing.
Confidence + Effort = A Guy Worth Knowing
6. Proofread Your Message
Ensure there are no grammatical or spelling mistakes (these are deal-breakers to some girls). There is a good chance that you will find at least one error that can be fixed in a matter of seconds.
First Message to a Girl, Examples:
So, if you are willing to send your first message to a girl on a dating app. Here are some example messages to compliment common interests:
- Hi! I’m really glad I swiped right! I love your sense of style, especially that __________. It’s cute 🙂
- Hey! I love how passionate you are to _________________. That’s so impressive. What do you like about it?
- Hey, I was just looking at your profile, and I noticed that we both love ___________. That’s really cool! What do you like about it?
- Hi, I really love your profile. You seem cool, and I think we have a lot in common based on our ___________. [In this sentence, you could also ask a question about the common interest to help continue the conversation.]
There are three reasons why the above messages can be a good start:
- a) proves that you have read her profile,
- b) you initiate a conversation on shared interest,
- c) shows you care about her interests and not merely about her looks.
I hope this article will give you some valuable tips to start a conversation with a girl on a dating site. I would love to hear more ideas and guidance in the comments.